Love Heals All Wounds (October 2002)

Natalya was ever so slowly starting to gain the trust of the others. After her wrist had healed, she had been given access to the gym. She spent most of her free time there. Nick had not been happy when Tony and Isabella had gone back on their word to turn Natalya over to SHIELD. With Kate's wounds healed, she was back at work. Phil had been understandably upset about the state Natalya had left her in, but Kate did not hold any grudges against her. Even so, she still kept her distance for now. Things between Steve and Natalya were the most tense and she had the most to prove to him after what she had done to Kate.

Natalya still wasn't sleeping well. She was still being locked in her room at night, which meant she had to wear herself out in the gym during the day in order to have a chance at sleeping. Today, James was with her in the training room. Her memories were still fuzzy, but felt like she was so close to unlocking them. For some reason, she felt that James was the key to this. Natalya and James were running through a simulated exercise. Something about them training together like this felt...familiar to Natalya.

Nearly 6 weeks had passed since Natalya was brought to the tower. To use the gym, which seemed to be what she wanted to do most of the time, she had to be escorted. James did this most of the time but Tony, Isabella or Steve did that as well though not nearly as often. The kids managed to catch a glance of her but it wasn't often and they were not allowed in the gym at all.

Natalya’s apartment though, like the others was complete. It had a bedroom, a living space, a walk in closet and a bathroom. Her apartment had no doorwall or balcony though and Tony had upgraded the keypad to be a hand print with a biometric scanner which included body heat. Today Natalya and James were down in the gym exercising together. They were engaging in personal resistance which used one another's body parts against the other. Normally the exercise wasn’t all that intimate but the way they were doing it seemed that they were closer than they really were. James pressed against her arm with his and also used his leg against hers and she inversely pressed back. Breathing was key to this exercise and constant pressure had to be applied on the other person lest they fall in a heap which had happened more than once. The first time James actually chuckled and Natgalya had smiled.

“So, is there anything you miss? So far, you haven’t asked for anything. I eat ‘way’ too much junk food now but my increased metabolism...allows me to eat whatever I want,” James said. “I love pizza and beer and anything chocolate,” He said. “I can get you whatever you wanted,” James said as he pressed into her. They were both sweating from the exertion and her scent, especially when she sweat, was distracting for James. He continued to apply himself to the exercise however.

Natalya and James were locked in an intense and rather intimate struggle against one another. Various parts of their bodies were pressed up against one another. It was not a competition, but rather a way of building strength and applying concentration. James had far more muscle mass than she did, and yet she was able to hold her own against him. Natalya was covered in a thin sheen of sweat that made her body seem to glisten under the lights. Natalya was aware that James was sweating too, and he had a musky scent that filled her nose and threatened to topple her concentration.

"I was not allowed to eat anything that wasn't approved," Natalya admitted. "So, it's hard for me to miss something that I've never had. I did eat that chocolate bar you gave me and I liked that."

“Isabella is an excellent cook, certainly you ate at restaurants while undercover?” James asked. “Drank a little wine?” He added. As he slowly shifted the way he pushed into her. She quickly caught on though to meet his efforts against her. His forearm was pressing up against her right breast now though, but that was due to how Natalya had to shift to keep her footing.

“You know that won’t work...I know...you did that on purpose,” James said with a slight grin in between breaths. Her forearm was against his chest as well but he didn’t think that that was the same. She was strong for how lithe she was but she also had curves. This type of exercise strengthened muscles that would never ordinarily get used. “I still want that kiss,” James said. They had been interrupted twice before they could actually kiss and James had just given up on that but he still thought about it though. Thought about her.

Natalya felt James shift his body and the way he was pressing into her and she had to adjust her own body to compensate for the changes he had made. She managed to shift her body so his forearm was pressing up against her right breast. As James suspected, she had done it on purpose to distract him. She couldn't help but grin back at him when he caught on to that. Natalya didn't smile often, but when she did it was beautiful. When James told her that he still wanted that kiss, she looked at him and found that her eyes met his. Their faces were close due to how they were pressing into each other's bodies and Natalya could feel James' warm breath against her lips.

‘It was warm and damp and the haze from the smoke was all around them. Natalya had shot out the camera behind him and then drew him back toward the steam pipes. He felt her hot breath in his mouth as she began to unbuckle his pants. There wasn’t much time but that had nothing to do with the urgency he felt…

Before James realized what he was doing he was kissing Natalya. Her lips were warm and familiar and he felt her kissing him back. James had given up the pressure against her then he was suddenly flipped into the air. He landed hard onto his back on the mat and in one, fluid motion, Natalya was on top of him with her forearm up against his throat. It didn’t remain there long though She collapsed upon him and he felt her hands grab hold of his long, damp hair as she attacked his lips with her own. He remembered making love to her though she was younger. Even so, he doubted her body was much different. Maybe even a little harder if anything. James hands moved to her bottom as she kissed him passionately.

“I remember,” He said in between her furious kisses and her tongue seeking out his as they kissed.

The moment James' lips touched her own it was like a floodgate was opened in Natalya's mind. Memories that had been forced back, deep into her mind by either Tatiana or herself were suddenly released. She remembered James. She remembered him training her. She remembered him kissing her. She remembered him making love to her. She remembered wanting to leave everything behind and go with him. She remembered what had happened in the limo. However, she also remembered everything Tatiana had done to her. She remembered the helmet...

Natalya didn't realize that she was crying until James pulled back from the kiss to look at her. "I remember too. I remember you...and I also remember everything else...everything that was done to me..."

It was a shock to feel her tears on his face and when she pulled back, to actually see them. At first James did not know what to do or how to feel. Emotions felt...alien to him. Like he remembered having emotions but now lacked the experience to understand and convey them. He didn’t know how to react to Natalya crying. But he did commiserate with her. He remembered everything as well. He did the only thing he could do, he pulled her into a hug and allowed her head to rest on his shoulder. He felt her sobs come and murmured soft, soothing sounds as she wept.

A considerable amount of time later, Natalya had stopped crying and James let her use his tower to wipe her face and eyes and blow her nose. They both rose and moved to sit on one of the side benches together. “It will get worse before it gets better, but it will get better Natalya. I can tell you that from experience,” James said as he reached up and brushed a few strands of her back. He kissed her cheek then looked into her eyes.

Natalya was grateful to James for what he did. He just held her and let her cry. She could tell he was uncomfortable and wasn't sure what to do, but what he did was just perfect for her. She didn't want to talk about it. She just wanted someone to hold her and comfort her.

Finally, she was able to compose herself and she got up and wiped her face. She could tell it was red from her tears. She sat down on one of the side benches and he sat down next to her. She heard what he said and she looked over at him. Her eyes met his as he brushed back some strands of her hair. "So...what do we do now?"

James thought about that a moment and he shifted to look out across the room before he returned his gaze back to her. "Take it one day at a time. Continue to train, continue to gain their trust," he said. He knew she'd know who he meant by 'their'. Right now the kids were not allowed near them unsupervised. James did not recall harming children but they might have been as collateral damage. He didn't think Natalya had either.

He leaned in toward her ear. "And more kissing...and...stuff," He whispered. He hoped she knew what he meant by 'stuff' as well. "It's been a long while since I've done...stuff," he said with a slight grin on his face.

Natalya actually smiled when James mentioned them doing “stuff.” She knew what he meant by that. “It’s been a while since I’ve done ‘stuff’ too.” She leaned in and kissed him gently and let her lips linger against his. “I thought you were dead that day,” she whispered against his lips. “The car was engulfed in flames, but you had pushed me out. If I had known you had escaped...”

James kept her face close to his and he brought his hand up to touch her face. He gently rubbed her bottom lip with his thumb. "One of us had to die or our controllers would have continued to pit us against one another. I didn't want them to do that to us. So I...died," James said. He had been burned from the accident and still had a few burn scars from that on his body. James kissed her bottom lip and then the top one and then her neck. His hands were always gentle when he touched her. Like she was made out of a delicate porcelain.

His heartbeat was beating quickly now that she was so close. James remembered everything now. Natalya had helped to fill in the gaps now that emotions had begun to come back to him. With them memories of intimate moments with her. She was so young then and he remembered liking that. But he was not in a hurry though. He liked just being so close to her. It was soothing to feel her so close and to know how she felt about him. He could feel her quickened heartbeat against his.

Though Natalya felt passion and desire for James, there was something deeper than that. Something that had only started to grow when they were separated...love. The feeling frightened Natalya as she now had something she truly cared about and was afraid of losing it. She was afraid that the SSB or SHIELD would take her away from James and she would never see him again. Being near him was calming to her. He made her feel like a normal woman...not like the monster the SSB had made her to be.

After a while they left the gym because the knew some of the others would be down to use it and Steve still didn't really like being around Natalya. That night, Natalya lay in her bed. She was still in the locked room next to James'. She had not yet earned the trust of the Starks to be given a different room. Through the wall, James might be awoken by the sounds of muttering in Russian. However, those more quiet sounds quickly grew louder and louder until they were shouts. They were not angry shouts, but shouts of fear.

Isabella and Tony were also awoken by the shouts and she looked at James as he came out of his room. "What's going on?"

James wiped his face as he paused to listen near the door. He heard movement and talking from the Stark's apartment but he was hesitant to go inside. "Nightmares," she's been having them off and on," James said. He had them to but nothing like this.

Theo convulsed as the images and sensations from the helmet that used to be placed over Natalya's head assaulted his mind and emotions. He grunted as blood trickled down his nose and to a lesser extent his ears. He never shut his door completely when he slept, he didn't like it closed for any reason, he had a moderate case of claustrophobia since he was a child. He fell out of his bed to the floor but with the helmet on him he couldn't cry out. 'Mother, help me mother!' He tried to scream but the words wouldn't come out. As Tony, Isabella and James conferred on what to do at Natalya'a door Theo managed to shove his door open with his shoulder. Tony looked over at the sudden noise in horror as Theo crawled from his bedroom. He vomited onto the floor then fell onto his side. The Stark's ran over to him and Tony fell onto his knees and lifted him up onto his lap. His face was bloody from the nose bleed as well as his ears and neck.

'They're...torturing her mother," Theo said softly as his body shook. And then he fell unconscious. James pressed his palm on the keypad and hurried into Natalya's room. he rushed to her bedroom and indeed she was asleep but also screaming in terror. He didn't know what to do, this was not something he was prepared for. He jumped behind her in her bed and was immediately hit and kicked from how much she was moving and flailing. His strong arms enfolded her and he pressed her back into him. Her head hit his nose so hard it was now bleeding but he never let go of her.

Isabella opened her mouth to continue to question James about these nightmares that Natalya had been having when suddenly she heard Theo cry out for help. She turned and looked back down the hallway towards his room. She saw him half out into the hallway. His face was white as a sheet and he was convulsing. There was blood running from his nose, and his ears. She rushed towards him as he vomited onto the floor. She was terrified by the state he was in. She heard what he said and then he became unconscious. Isabella was glad that Serena was spending the night at a friend's house. She didn't want her to see this. She looked at Tony.

"We need to get him to the bio bed."

Natalya was thrashing around on her bed. She spoke in Russian, although her words were just a random stream and nothing that made sense. As James got into the bed behind her she hit and kicked him as she thrashed about. However, as his arms wrapped around her she slowly began to settle down.

James had heard Natalya before but this was by far the worst he had experienced. He wondered what horrible things were being done to her as she screamed and twitched. She was soaked in sweat but he wouldn’t let go of her. That was in part because holding her as he did seemed to calm her. And part that he didn’t want to get pummeled again. Natalya was strong and in this state her strength went unchecked.

Theo had once again shut down his body. His mind could not rationalize what he was experiencing and so he had reduced his heart rate and bodily functions to near death. The Psychic episode was so powerful that it affected his physical state and his body was not prepared for that kind of strain. Isabella would see all the instruments gauge him as near death but they were so consistent in the bed’s memory with Theo’s prior scans when he did this that she guessed what was happening. Tony wiped off his face and cleaned the blood from his ears and neck with a soft, white towel.

“What’s happening to our boy Isabella?” Tony asked. “I’ve never seen him this bad before. I think we need to talk to Natalya again. I think we need to know what’s been done to her,” Tony said in a grave voice as he used a q-tip doused in warm water to clean out his ears.

Natalya's screams slowly faded and the thrashing stopped. However, James would still be able to hear her muttering in her sleep in Russian and her body remained tense in his arms. She was drenched in sweat and still trembled.

Isabella ran her hands through her hair as she paced back and forth in the medical suite. Her mind was certainly wide awake now and she was fretting with worry for her son. "Yes, we need to know what was done to Natalya, but we need to find a way to help Theo. His physic link with other people is causing problems. He needs to learn to control it. I am wondering if it wouldn't be best for us to send him to spend some time with Professor Xavier."