The Process of Falling in Love (February 2001)

Natalya had been training with the team now for several months. She had not been made an official member of the team, but Tony and Isabella were impressed by her. Natalya's overall mental health seemed to be improving because of her involvement. Dr. Weston had taken her off of the anti-depressants, but she remained on the sleep aid due to nightmares she often had. She was gaining the trust of the rest of the team over time. She had not yet done anything to prove that they couldn't trust her and Isabella truly believed she was a changed woman. Things between Natalya and Logan had improved, though they weren't lovers yet. 

They were currently running through a training exercise led by Steve. The training room had state of the art technology that allowed them to simulate certain battle situations.

In this exercise The X-Men had been completely simulated. The premise was that Xavier's mind had been compromised and he was controlling them to Fight the Avengers. Tony had done the best he could with the X-Men's design, which meant everyone was a dead ringer for their real life counterpart. In the simulation Nightcrawler had picked up Kate and dropped from several hundred feet in the air. Isabella managed to snag her just in time. Natalya was fighting Cyclops and his eye beam was destroying everything she tried to hide behind. Logan was ofcourse gunning for Scott and him trying to kill Natalya made him focus on him. Tony was being held down by Colossus and at the same time, blinded by Storm. As Logan came in to get Cyclops Jean Gray suddenly appeared and he hesitated. Cyclops hit him with his beam then was free to take out Natalya who had been the focus on their attack this time. If the focus was 'killed' in the simulation, the simulation ended as a failure. The lights suddenly died and the room lights came back on. The holograms disappeared and all was set back to normal.

Logan stood up. "Dirty pool putting her in like that," Logan growled as Tony exited his suit. He was munching on a power bar. "She's part of their team Logan. What would you have me do?" He asked. "Well...it caught me offguard," Logan spat then stomped off to go for a swim and cool off.

Kate was not pleased with how the training went. They had been sloppy and Logan had hesitated, which had allowed Cyclops to "kill" Natalya. For Natalya, learning to work with a team often proved to be a challenge. She was used to working as an individual and handling situations on her own. Working as a team meant that she wasn't in charge of what was happening. However, today, she had done everything she had been supposed to do. It had been Logan that had failed. Natalya wasn't sure who the red-headed woman was, but clearly there was something much deeper going on. She waited until Logan left before looking at the others.

"Ok, so what was that all about?"

Tony chuckled. "Jean Gray is what that was about," Tony said as he munched on his bar. He scratched his head as he recalled what had happened. "See, Logan was in love with Jean Gray. However she was married to Scott Summers, Cyclops, their leader," he said as he chewed. "I think she really cared for Logan but Logan was a wildcard and Scott was..." he began then looked at Isabella. "What was Scott in this story honey? Tony asked Isabella.

Isabella had taken off her suit and she picked up her water bottle. "Stable," she answered before taking a sip of her water and then walking over to Natalya. "Jean Gray was the reason Logan left the X-Men and came here." Natalya nodded a little. "Oh...I see."

Natalya went back to her room to shower, but she paused before getting into the shower. She stood there a moment and sighed before turning the water off. She walked over and pulled out her black, one-piece bathing suit. She put on her robe before walking down to the pool. Once there, she pulled off her robe and glanced over at Logan before getting into the water. She swam around a little bit before deciding to do something that was either going to get Logan to laugh...or to kill her. She splashed him playfully with some water.

Logan liked the water, he liked the peace of floating. He smelled Natalya enter the pool area though he kept his eyes closed. He heard her hop in and heard her swimming around. He knew he blew the training session and next time he would not be distracted so easily. He would harden himself to that kind of surprise. Tony had just caught him offguard. He was just floating with his arms out when suddenly Natalya splashed him. Watch shot up his nose and Logan shifted in the water as he began to sputter. Natalya was there grinning like a school girl and Logan's angry scowl shifted into a curious snarl. He paused as she just shrugged at him and then he attacked.

He splashed her right in the face and then they began to splash one another and chase one another. Logan lunged at her but she managed to keep out of his grip and dunked his head under water. Bubbles floated up from Logan's nose as he blew air out in surprise of what she did. When he surfaced she tried to swim away but he grabbed hold of her leg then flung himself on her, submerging her under the water. Logan let her up and when she surfaced he splashed her in the face again and swam backward away from her.

"That's what ya get!" Logan said playfully.

Natalya screamed playfully as they began to splash each other back and forth. She laughed when Logan "attacked" her and when she re-emerged after being submerged under the water she spit water at him and laughed. Her dark hair was loose and soaking wet. It clung to her face and neck. Soon their laughing began to dissipate as they found themselves looking into each other's eyes. 

"Are you still in love with her?" Natalya asked softly.

"No," Logan said quickly as if he anticipated the question. "I just never anticipated being pitted against her in combat is all," Logan said. "I don't think of her much," He said as he touched bottom with his feet. They were in the fairly shallow section of the pool and he walked slowly toward her in the water. "I think about you, these days," He said honestly as he put his arms around her waist. "You certainly appear to be coming along well, in training. I think Steve is impressed as he felt her legs go around him he shifted toward the edge of the pool where one of the jets under the water shot out warm water. He put Natalya's back against one and it felt like a massaging jet on her back.

Natalya had flirted with more men than she could ever be able to count. She knew how to manipulate them into getting what she wanted and then she would drop them without a second though. But Logan...Logan made her feel things that she had never felt before and in many ways it frightened her, but it also excited her. As she felt his arms go around her waist she felt her heartbeat begin to quicken and her cheeks start to flush. She wrapped her legs around his waist as he backed her up against one of the massaging jets. She knew in that moment that she wanted him...but not here.

"Let's go back to your room," she said in a sexy whisper.

Logan did not expect Natalya to suggest what she did. He thought that taking it slow, was...taking it slow. But he would not put her off either. They had avoided physical contact for the most part though they had kissed a couple of times. Now though it appeared she was ready for more and he was more than ready. Having her in his life again had not been what he expected but she was one of the good guys now and he wanted her.

"Alright," He said slowly. He had only just planned on making out with her. They were alone here but if she wanted more...he was game for that too. He swam back, got out of the poolk and grabbed a white towel on his way out.

Natalya climbed out of the pool and Logan followed after her. She put on her robe and without a word they headed up to his apartment. They walked in and as soon as the doors were closed they attacked each other. Natalya found herself pressed up against the door with her legs wrapped around him as they kissed passionately. No words were spoken. They didn't need words. They needed each other. Memories of how good they were together came flooding back to her as she ran her hands down his body.

Logan began to pull and claw at her bathing suit. First one arm and then the other then he pulled it down below her full breasts. He put his mouth on her right nipple as he felt her press his face up against her. She all but fed him her left as he marched them back to his bedroom. He was out of his swimming trunks before she could blink and before long he was inside of her with her hands on his hips urging him toward her eagerly.

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With Logon on top of her and she prone on the bed, Logan groaned as he came for the second time. Her dark hair was fanned out around her head and her back was covered in sweat where their bodies had been connected. In that position Logan was in total control. He held her as he made love to her and though it put her in a submissive position it was Logan taking control and providing her with pleasure for them both. He rolled off of her panting. From his recollection she had orgasmed twice though the second time seemed much more powerful than the first with him dominating her like he was.

Neither of them moved as the warmth of what they just did still settled through them. That and if she moved too quickly she'd make a mess of his bed sheet. He had come alot.

Logan turned to look at her and saw that she was looking at him. "Thanks for...cheering me up," he said between breaths.

Natalya was trying to catch her breath as the waves of pleasure slowly dissipated. She was covered in a thin sheen of sweat that made her body glisten under the lights. Natalya hadn't had sex in a while and Logan was just as good as she had remembered him being. However, this time it was even better because there were no more lies between them. She looked over at Logan and after a moment he looked at her. She couldn't help but grin a little at what he said. She didn't know what was going on between them exactly, but it didn't really matter at the moment. They would figure things out when they needed to. 

She laid there for a little while before she grinned at him. "Get me a beer."

"As you wish," Logan said simply and got up. He went to her refrigerator and got out 2 beers. He popped the caps off and then came back to see her go into the bathroom. He sat on the edge of the bed still completely naked and took a sip of his beer as he waited for her to come out. When she did he spread his legs so she could come up close to him and put a hand on her left hip as she tilted her head back to drink. He leaned forward and kissed the space just below and to the center of her fabulous breasts. In her nakedness, Natalya put a model to shame. Every part of her was like it was sculpted, even the hair between her legs was perfect.

"Eventually, you'll step outside of this tower. We all want to see that happen...eventually," Logan said as he looked up at her.

Natalya was completely comfortable in her own skin. Her body was tight and toned, without being overly so. Her skin was as if formed from perfect alabaster. There was not a freckle or mole anywhere to be seen. Although, up close, there were several faded scars that Natalya had received during her training with the SSB and various missions. Even with those, she was still extremely beautiful. Tatiana had told her that she had chosen her parents very carefully and accepted nothing but perfection in them both. 

Natalya stepped up to Logan and smiled as she felt him kiss her body. The beer was cold and tasted wonderful after their amorous activities. However, something Logan said made her pause and look at him. 

"You just said 'eventually' twice. Do you still not trust me?"

Logan didn't stop kissing her. "Its not about trust. Tony's working on something incase the SSB or SHIELD make a play for you. I don't know what it is. It's about you not being picked up and tossed into a van," Logan said. "Part of that is time, part of it is whatever he's doing," Logan said without missing a beat on his kissing. His hands lightly massaged her hips and buttocks and thighs as if worshiping her body. His kisses were soft and gentle and numerous. His thumb found a pale scar about 2 inches long down her ribcage. And another about an inch long where she had been stabbed on her hip. He turned her around slowly and began to kiss the small of her back and her buttocks as his strong hands massaged her strong thighs. He didn't know why he was doing this. He was just happy to be with her again and he wanted her to be happy as well. To remember this moment. To remember him.

"I mean, I'd like to go out with you. Do stuff but he said no," Logan said as he leaned back on the bed to just look at her. He was eyeing her sexy butt and his grin of approval made his dark eyes brighten.

Natalya actually felt relieved to know that Logan did trust her. She had craved his trust above everyone else in the Tower and after all she had done to him she knew it was going to take time. She never wanted him not to trust her again. 

She couldn't help but smile as Logan continued to kiss her. She found she quite liked having him all but worship her body. His hands were not soft, but she actually liked the roughness of them against her skin. She smiled and moved over to lounge on the bed again. She lay on her back, propped up against a few pillows as she sipped her beer. She thought about what he had said a little while ago and sighed. "I failed Tatiana...twice. I doubt the SSB wants me back. If they do anything it will probably be to try and kill me."

"Well, everyone here would stop them if they tried. You're one of us now," He said as he laid back on the bed and rested on his arms. His feet were still on the floor. He was near her feet and looked up at the ceiling. "While I hold no 'claim' to your person you're important to me Natalya. I haven't felt...right since that day in the Arctic. I didn't think I asked for much from the world. My life has not been a picnic...and I'm not suggesting that yours is any easier. I just wanted one thing," he said as he shifted onto his side. His body was right there for her to look at. He was quite a hairy man with course, curly hair on his body. Much like an animal. Logan was 'her' animal though. A beast of a man. He tilted his head to take another sip of his beer.

"I wanted you," He said softly as the memory of that died had killed some of the light in his eyes.

Natalya had never known the feeling of being apart of a team...no, a family...until now. It brought her a feeling of strength that didn't come from muscles, but from the heart. She knew in that moment that she would protect any of them with her life. She was no longer alone...she would never be alone again. 

She looked at Logan and into his eyes as he spoke. His words touched her and as she looked at him she knew that there would never be another man for her...only him.

"You have me Logan...I'm yours."

Logan could make love to Natalya until she was so sore she couldn't move. He considered jumping on top of her again but he decided that she had had enough. "Then I'd like you to stay here, with me. You can still have your room. I don't really care what the others think. Isabella won't like it but she'll come around," he said. "I think we could help each other. I know you have nightmares. And well, I'd like to," he began then shifted forward. "Have this," he said as his hand touched her between her legs. "Whenever I want without having to sneak into your room to have it," He said with an unabashed smile. "I doubt I'll ever get enough of you to satisfy me," Logan said.

It really wasn't fair. His body regenerated everything. His endurance, strength, fatigue. He could live without food and water indefinitely which meant his bodily fluids regenerated as well. Just looking at her sipping her beer was sexy. "I'm gunna have to learn to...pace myself," he said as he rolled back onto his back. "Is there such a thing as 'too much' of a good thing?" He said as if to himself.

Natalya looked at Logan. "Ok, so for me to agree to staying with you in your room there are going to have to be a couple of rules. I'm not your personal maid and no I will not wear a maid's costume. You pick up after yourself. I do need to sleep so if I say 'no' or 'no more' then you will listen to what I'm saying and stop." She was quiet for a few moments as dark memories came back to her. She looked down and tears actually started to come to her eyes. "Tatiana used to allow other agents to do whatever they wanted to me. I had no control over my own body. I was nothing more than something to fuck and I won't be that again."

Logan's head snapped over to look at her and he shifted up onto his side again. "That's not how it will be...I mean...You don't 'have' to stay here. I just want you too," Logan amended. "And I just like having sex with you. I want to please you," he said quickly. "You can say no Natalya. Or you can tell me to just fuck off or just give you oral then fuck off. There's no script here. If you think I know what I'm doing than you're mistaken. I am just going on autopilot, how I feel about you," he said.

"And I 'can' take care of myself ya know," he said in a defensive tone though he looked and saw the overflowing hamper. "No maid outfits? Aw man!" He whined though it was just to make her laugh.

Natalya did laugh and she wiped away the wetness from her eyes. She hated crying. She still viewed it as a sign of weakness. She tried to tell herself that it was ok to be weak, but Tatiana's words echoed in her head. 

"I'm sorry. I know you're not like that, but it's just that my entire life my body has belonged to someone else. I do want to stay here with you though. Maybe we can try it out for a few days and see how it goes first."

"Ok but I have to ask...do you know how to do laundry?" He asked. He snickered when she threw a pillow at him. It hit him in the face and he laughed. "I'm only using half of the closet and drawers. If you got alot of stuff, we can fit another dresser there," he said and pointed. "I don't mind doing laundry actually. Folding clothes and such. I'm certain if you want me to do yours...we can...come to 'some' arrangement. I will work for sex," he said and twerked his eyebrows at her.

"I'll talk to Isabella for us if you like?" Logan said.

Natalya was still learning how to be a more normal person. That meant learning how to do basic things like laundry. She hadn't actually tried it yet. Isabella and Kate had been doing her laundry for her. However, she knew she was going to need to learn sometime. She was determined to become an independent woman. However, she couldn't help but smile and laugh a little at his offer. She took a sip of her beer and looked over at him when he offered to talk to Isabella for them.

"You've known her for much longer than I have so I think it would be better if you talk to her." Natalya knew that it was really Isabella that ran the Tower and was ultimately in charge. "So, how long have you known the Starks?"