The Thin Line Between Good and Evil

Nathan leaned up against the weathered wooden fence as he watched the horses run. He wore his leather jacket and black wool pants that he bloused into his tall, black boots. Under it he wore the white shirt Sabella liked to see him in. All their horses were in the pasture to graze and stretch their legs and he imagined how it would be to be a horse. To not have the worries that he has now. The sun was shining and though it was cold today he didn’t really feel it. The Oracle, Sabella, Sloan and Albereth were all there in the back of his mind. Tugging him, pulling him, guiding him into an early grave. He could feel it he thought. Sense it in the air. Smell the sodden earth that was thrown over him. And then as the wind changed he Smelled Sabella.

He didn’t move from where he was to greet her and he didn’t stop her from sidling up against him. “You’re not going to like it,” he said plainly, not looking at her. He blinked his eyes slowly as if he was weary. Not in his body but mentally, emotionally he felt drained. He straightened and sighed as he turned to look into her eyes. She was so beautiful he thought and remembered how silky soft her hair was to run his fingers through. She loved it when he did that and indeed she must have sensed his thought because she smiled up at him.

“He wants us to let Sloan go,” he said with a frown.

Sabella knew that she would find Nathan outside. Whenever he was upset he would always leave the mansion and get out into the fresh air. It didn't take her long to locate him. She spotted him standing near the pasture watching the horses. She could sense he knew she was coming, but he didn't turn around to greet her like he normally did. She could feel the frustration and anger in his mind as she neared him. She looked at him and could see how emotionally drained he was. It made him look several years older. She hated to see him like this and wished she could take away his worries. She wanted to tell him that they could run away together...far away from all of this. They could buy their own house and raise a family. However, she knew that they couldn't. They needed to stay and see this through to the bitter end.

When Nathan told her that The Oracle wanted them to let Sloan go she sighed and was quiet a moment before responding softly.

"There must be a reason for it."

Nathan watched her silently for a time. Watched as her mind began to chew on what he had just told her. He thought he trusted the Oracle but this went far beyond trust. He began to wonder if his ‘attack’ had somehow affected his mind. He began to ‘doubt’ him right then. “You are willing to follow him so blindly? Sloan murdered Westley and Myrna...and...and who knows how many others,” he said uneasily. He would not say his unborn child though that was implied. Nathan had killed innocent people. People filled with the sickness of fear and misguided justice. Sloan was the father of all that and he made them all pay for their mistake to follow him. He laid their deaths at his feet as well and the scars of it he’d carry with him for the rest of his days.

He shifted and put his hands on her arms and his expression was severe. “Ask of me anything Sabella but not that, please, not that. Sloan MUST die for what he’s done!” he said in a hard voice. His eyes looked severe too and something else, was it fear? It was not like Nathan at all to feel fear. Fear that she’d ask him to let Sloan go or not too though? If not he knew he was going to hang Sloan though he’d love to watch him burn too. He could only imagine Myrna, screaming as the flames licked at her feet.

Sabella felt torn. On the one hand she had never doubted The Oracle. But on the other she hated Sloan and, like Nathan, did not want to let him go. She wanted to make him pay for what he had done. She sighed, unsure of what to do or say. She was quiet for a long while before she finally spoke.

“I think we must trust The Oracle. He has guided us this this far. I don’t think we should doubt him now.”

Nathan let Sabella go immediately and though he did not explode in disagreement his eyes, so fierce and how he loomed over her made her take a step back. “You forget that given the chance he would have cut Francis’s throat right in front of us and not had an inkling of guilt for it,” He said in a soft, dangerous tone. “I will take no part in his release. I will take no part in the deaths of the innocent people he murders. It speaks more of insanity than of prophecy Sabella Carver,” he said. The point of using her name was to remind her that she was his wife first and a daughter to the Oracle, second. “If...if you only knew…” He began ominously but then stopped himself. Sloan was hardly sufficient reason to throw this entire plan into jeopardy. ‘Foolish man!’ He scolded and tightened his lip. He could only hope that she did not try to read is mind. And yet part of him did want that. He was altogether tired of not being able to share his knowledge of what was coming. Knowing it, waiting for it alone was beginning to take its toll upon him.

Sabella had known that Nathan would not react well to her response, but the way his eyes suddenly looked and the way he loomed over her made her take a small step back. She looked at him.

If...if you only knew…

If she only knew what? Up until now Sabella had respected Nathan's right not to tell her what was going on, but now she felt she needed to know. She lifted her hand up to touch his forehead. At first he began to swat her hand away, but one strong look from her made him suddenly stop. She placed her hand against is head and closed her eyes...

She began to see images of what Nathan had created into his own head. He had alot of time to look at it from many different angles and strategize what he wanted to do. She saw several figures approaching the house. One was Quell and the others she knew as Albereth, Kindle and Amy...and someone else she didn’t recognize. Before them over a hundred drones ran toward the house.

Within an instant the entire scene went dark and she saw a haziness that opened into the inside of the house and the point of view floated up to the top of the stairs. Nathan had hold of her arm and she had on Quora. She was linked to everyone and they were linked to her as she looked through Nathan’s eyes.

Francis created an ice wall just outside the house and the battle for the Oracle, for their lives began. At the end of it, long after it was over they buried their dead and among them was Nathan. Oddly he saw himself being tossed into the ground with what he had on and he landed haphazardly down into the freshly dug hole. She saw herself weeping as she was carried away when they began to fill the hole up with dirt.

The odd thing was that everything was hazy as if uncertain except for the cross that was planted into the ground. The letters of his name were well defined and easy to read. Nathan knew what she saw and he sighed as unbidden tears fell down his cheeks. His knees suddenly felt weak right then and he lowered down onto his hip and she followed him down and retained her contact with him.

She saw His life with Myrna and how happy he had been when she told him that she was pregnant. That image began to blur and was replaced by her screaming for him to save her and he stood near and did nothing while he watched her die. That scene quickly changed though into the real one where he was at her torched feet and he reached up pathetically to touch her as the flesh he touched broke off and fell into ashes.

Backing up she witnessed the conversation the oracle had with Nathan. And hearing those words, “For you there is no outcome that begins nor ends with you living through it,” he said. She felt Nathan’s inner fear but then his ultimate acceptance as he began to conduct the training.

“I’m...so sorry Sabella,” he said sadly. And she knew that he was more concerned about her losing him, losing someone she loved than he actually dying. He had tried to make peace with it, peace with his decision to stay knowing what it all meant for him. But his desire to live was strong and he still had hope that he may yet find a way to survive.

Sabella didn't realize it, but tears had begun to slip down her cheeks. When she opened her eyes she found that they were on the ground and she saw Nathan's face stained with his own tears. She felt sick to her stomach and dizzy from an overwhelming fear that came over her. This could not happen to her again! She could not lose another man she loved...she wouldn't! She began to shake her head...as if willing what she saw not to be true.

"No...no...I refuse to let this happen Nathan. I cannot lose you! Please, just leave...go. You've trained us...me...we can fight Albereth without you here and once it is over I will come to you and we will be able to live in peace...together."

It took Nathan a bit of time to shut away those thoughts that Sabella had pulled to the surface. It was not easy to be opened up like a box and picked through like he was. He turned to face her and reached up and wiped her tears away with his thumb. “I’m...sorry Sabella...you know I can’t just leave. You know what will happen if I do,” he said mournfully. Now that it was out he didn’t have to own this alone. He felt some guilt from that but also relief. He pulled her onto him and let her rest her head on his chest. “Oh how I love you,” He said in her ear and kissed her cheek. No one ever told him life was fair. But god did it have to be so cruel as well?

The shock of what she had seen slowly began to fade away and she felt her resolve suddenly strengthen. She looked at him and into his eyes. "If you won't leave then we will work together and find a way to change this. There must be a way and I will find it. You are not going to get away from me that easily Nathan Carver." She then kissed him deeply and passionately.

Nathan kissed her back and they made out for some time before they finally came back inside. Quietly he told Ben, Rory and Tomas about what Sabella wanted to do with Sloan and he asked them to help her though he still would take no hand in his release beyond that. For the free day Tomas played the fiddle and they shifted several tables in the dining room so people could dance if they wanted to and they broke out a keg of ale as well. Rory was by far the best dancer as far as the men went and he kept asking women who were more than happy to join him out there. Those that watched clapped and laughed as the dancers moved about the room. Ben asked Rose and Len asked Irene. Sabella tried to pull Nathan out but Nathan admitted that he could not dance and it was Rory who finally obliged her.

Whipping her skirts about as she did, Nathan thought she moved with a sublime grace and he sipped his mug of ale as he watched them. He looked around for Leila but he hadn’t seen her. Everyone knew she was the best dancer there and it was then that they all heard the gunshot from beneath their feet. “The Dungeon!” Nathan shouted in alarm and set his mug on a side table. They all ran toward the cellar door and Rory took a moment to pick up his rifle and pistol as he trailed behind the others. When they finally got downstairs, Sabella was in the lead they found Leila by Sloan’s cell. Sloan was on the ground with a pool of blood around him. Leila, who looked like she were in a daze held a pistol down at her side as she watched the man bleed to death. Her shot hit him in the chest it seemed and he doubled over and ended up on his knees.

Sabella knew that Nathan did not want to release Sloan, but she trusted The Oracle...she always had and she always would. She was glad, however, that Nathan was going to allow it. With his possible death still on her mind, they walked back into the mansion to try and enjoy their day off. They would tell no one what The Oracle had told Nathan and inside everyone seemed happy and carefree. A keg of ale suddenly appeared and Rory got out his fiddle. Music filled the mansion and Sabella watched as several couples began to dance. She tried to get Nathan to get up and dance with her, but he would not. However, he allowed Rory to dance with her, which pleased her greatly. For a few moments Sabella was able to forget about everything and she just danced and smiled and laughed.

That is until she heard the gunshot. Everyone stopped immediately and Sabella looked at Nathan. Together, they all rushed down into the cellar. Sabella was at the front of the group and she felt a wave of fear wash over her as she rounded the corner. To her horror she saw Sloan laying in a pool of blood and Leila standing there with a pistol in her hands. Sabella rushed over to Leila and took the gun from her hands and handed it to Ben. She then put her arm around her shoulders to comfort her as Nathan checked on Sloan.

"Is he...?"

Tomas unlocked the door and Nathan moved onto a knee and pulled his head back. He had seen enough dead men to know what one looked like. His only response was a curt nod and a furl to his brow. Liriel lifted the pistol up to Sabella for her to take. She still appeared in a daze and her eyes didn’t appear to show any remorse for doing what she did. “Someone had to do what you would not,” she said in a monotone voice. Her eyes had an emotionless, distant look to them. Nathan stood and his face was filled with worry as he turned his head and spoke to Rory. “Take her back to her room...Tomas, you go with him and guard her door until we can figure out what to do with her,” he said. The men nodded but the women turned and began in on Nathan immediately as the two men took her in hand and moved away with her in tow.

“He got what he deserved!” Rose said angrily and gestured to him. “He would kill any a us,” Irene added. “You saw how close he was ta killin me!” Francis said scornfully. “Fuck em!” Dalana said and spat and several of the men agreed. Worriedly Nathan’s eyes flickered to Sabella’s who had a look of deep concern. Was this by design or had something changed what was supposed to happen? They couldn’t know and they couldn’t change it certainly. Finally Nathan only sighed.

“Ben...Edward, take Sloan out and bury him in the woods. You know where,” he said as he looked at Ben and ben nodded slowly. Neither men looked pleased to have to be involved but they moved with a purpose anyway and lifted sloan up. He tasked Carla to clean up the mess and the rest of them went back upstairs in an attempt to at least try to enjoy the rest of their free day. Nathan intended to he took Sabella by the wrist and dragged her upstairs to their room and it would be clear what he intended for her.

A little while later Sabella lay in Nathan's arms in their bed. She was still trying to wrap her head around everything that was happening. She felt rather overwhelmed with the prospect of Nathan dying and now Leila had killed Sloan and possibly changed the future dramatically. Why did life for them have to be so difficult? Why couldn't they live happily like so many others did? She wanted a normal life, but she knew that that was never going to happen.

After a while she sat up, pulling the sheet around her and grabbed the bottle of wine they had brought up with them. She poured herself a glass and took a sip and looked at Nathan.

"So, what do we do now?"

Nathan was disappointed when she covered her nakedness with the sheet but it was apparent that she wanted to talk and knew he could be easily distracted. He shifted and brought his feet up then held his legs up to his chest. Her tone sounded worried and he couldn't really blame her. He was very worried at just about everything. Was he going to die? Was there something she could do? Was this all just more of the Oracle just telling them what they needed to hear? He didn't know. He didn't really know anything save for how he felt about Sabella and what they needed to do when Albereth came. 

“What are we going to do about Leila?” He asked. “I don't want to call it murder but he was defenseless and in a cage,” he said plainly but what he thought was that Sloan got what was coming to him and likely the Oracle had some part to play in the way he died too. There was a lot of the Oracles hand into what was happening. Indirectly things seemed to shift awkwardly and Nathan knew he had had a hand on it all.

Sabella sighed and poured Nathan a glass of wine and handed it to him. She took a sip of her own while contemplating Leila's fate. She was quiet for a long while as she considered everything. It was true that Sloan had been ultimately defenseless, but he had murdered innocent people.

"I think we should just let it be and move on. We have far bigger things to worry about at this point and now Sloan won't be hurting anyone else."

Nathan wanted to argue but he felt it was just him wanting to fight. With her, the Oracle, with anyone. He accepted the wine and just stared into the glass. The dark liquid reminded him of blood. Sloan's blood. There seemed to be a thin line between good and evil. What Leila did was neither and yet both.

"If something happens, "he began and then turned around to look at her. His face was as hard and serious as it ever was. "You have to kill Albereth," he said in a plain tone.

Sabella looked at her husband and was quiet a moment when he told her that she would have to kill Albereth. She slowly nodded and said nothing. She downed her wine and then put the glass off on the side table. When Nathan was done with his she lay back down with him and curled up next to him.

"Tell me what our lives will be like after all of this is over..."

She was soft and warm up against him and he’d like to stay like this forever of he could. But he knew he couldn't. There was no forever for them. Which is why her request did not sit well with him. It spoke of her just wanting to paint the best picture she could though he could not be on that painting. 

“Don't do that Sabella,” he asked in a soft tone. “Don't make me think that i can escape what's coming. It will only make everything harder…” He said as he lifted her up enough so he could roll off the bed. He moved back over to the wine and refilled his glass. He was still naked and the scars on his back were no just long gray or pink runnels in his flesh. He had a few new fading marks too and bruises from their recent skirmishes with Albereth minions. He drank down half of his glass before he felt her arms come around him from behind. He felt her body up against him and felt her kiss one of his scars by his shoulder. He tried to remember that she was younger than he by several years and never been in a war. Well there were only veterans now. And not everyone was going to survive. Why shouldn't he be one of the ones that died? If had to. Not Rose or Irene or Sabella. Just him of it had to be. But he didn't have to like it. And he was going down without a fight either.

Sabella sighed and pulled back from Nathan. She grabbed her robe and put it on and stood up. She then looked at him, feeling her anger and frustration rise.

"Fine Nathan...give up...don't fight...don't give yourself a chance. Because if you don't believe that you have a chance then you certainly will die. Me, I'm going to fight for you. I'm going to continue to hold out hope because in the end that's all I have! I refuse to lose two men that I love in two years...I refuse! So you go ahead and roll over and give up, but just know this...that I won't...not now...not ever!"

She then walked into their bathroom and slammed the door behind her.

In outrage Nathan moved and with his leg he kicked the door in. If Sabella had been near it it would have hurt her for certain. The top hinge came completely off and the door hung ajar barely on the one that was left. He stood there naked and his eyes burned with a very dangerous light. He didn't care that she was upset right then only that she tried to bring him false hope. For what? To keep him in his feet? Was she working with the Oracle again? And it brought him even darker thoughts like why she had agreed to marry him. Without thinking he dragged her out of the bathroom by her robe and she was lucky it wasn't by her hair with how angry he was. The shadows in the room seemed to dim the available light and they tremored slightly as he dragged her up onto the bed. He straddled her and it was not easy for him to get a hold of her arms as she had been able to slap him several times. Finally though he had managed to grab her wrists and his hands were like vices as they held her arms down.

Sabella jumped when Nathan kicked the door in. Thankfully, she had not been standing near it, otherwise she would have been hurt. She did not like the look in his eyes and she started to back away from him but there was nowhere for her to go. He gabbed her and began to drag her out of the bathroom. She hit him in an attempt to get him to let her go. He got her up onto their bed and actual fear came over her as he straddled her and pinned down her wrists. She knew she had the ability to knock him out, but she did not like him like this. She looked up at him with a look she had never given him before...real fear. She was actually trembling.

"This is not the man I married. You told me when we married that you would never hurt me. Until this very moment I believed you. Please let go of me Nathan before I have to hurt you...something I do not want to do."

Nathan’s eyes took on a dark, thoughtful look as if deciding what to do next and it was obvious to her that he hadn't planned any of this. She had upset him unknowingly and this is where they were. 

“No...strike me down with your power if you are really afraid of me. Until just now I thought I married a woman but clearly it is just a girl playing at being something more than she is,” he said but refused to let her go. “We have a connection but we really don't know one another,” he continued. “Where would I like us to be? How about you fat with a babe in your belly, my babe and in house aprons making our supper!” He chided coldly and readjusted as she struggled. “All I hear is how you won't lose me or let me go. How are ‘they’ any different Sabella?” He asked angrily. “All of them will face this with us, stop worrying bout yourself for once and open your god damn eyes to the others that need you right now!” He scolded.

Sabella's eyes shifted from fear to anger at his words. "How dare you Nathan! I never once said that I wasn't going to fight for them. I am! And I will continue to do so! I will fight harder than everyone here to keep them safe. I will risk my own life for them if I have to! But I will also fight for you Nathan whether you like it or not!

Her eyes slowly softened and tears filled them. "I...I need you Nathan. Without you I won't be whole. I refuse to imagine my life without you because I can't."

“But yet this is why I am here Sabella, don’t you get it?” He asked. "The Oracle is playing us both. Why else would he send you to ‘collect’ me,” he began and let her wrists go. He didn't get off of her though. He was afraid she’d just bolt and he wasn't done talking to her just yet. 

“He continued to put you next to me, used how young and beautiful you are to draw me and keep a hold on me. He knew i’d have left otherwise. He’s afraid of being taken and has used us all to protect himself,” Nathan said relentlessly. Already he saw disbelief in her eyes and she shook her head. “Your an intelligent woman Sabella, I think you can put the pieces together if you try but your so blindly loyal you can't see what others can see!” He said. “I'm nothing more than a sacrifice just like Westley to keep you In His life and himself from being taken. He cares nothing for the rest of us and the sooner you understand that, the sooner you can start making bloody decisions for yourself!” Nahan said.