What a Woman Wants

With all that had been happening, Eldarion was quite busy as the family spent their attentions with the wedding. And the problems they’ve been having West of the mountains. But that wasn’t why he was returning home so late tonight. To appease Calista he had agreed to try for a child. They argued and fought alot but they also were a strong team that complemented one another well. At this time of the month she was very moody and also tried to jump him like a spider monkey every time he turned around. She was insatiable and though he enjoyed that sometimes he wasn’t certain he really wanted a child right now and had no idea, besides avoiding having sex with her, how to tell her he didn’t.

He wanted to travel West and see the lands there, Bree, the Shire and beyond. Having a baby along would be difficult and he wasn’t certain Calista would want to go. He hesitated just as he was about to open their door. It was very late and he doubted she’d still even be up. He nodded confidently, entered then shut the door quietly behind him.

Calista's maternal desires had been on the rise as of late. Leaving those two girls, whom she had become emotionally attached to, had been one of the hardest things she had ever had to do and now with the King and Queen's adoption of Elfwine she felt her want for a baby growing. Things between Eldarion and herself had been rocky. They were trying, but what had happened could not be undone and it was still difficult for her at times to fully trust him. However, they still attended functions together and dinners and went out for walks and rides. But despite this, something felt like it was missing from her life. She knew that she and Eldarion had talked about traveling beyond Gondor and heading north, but those talks had not happened since is affair. She believed a baby could and would fix everything between them.

He had been out late that night with a few friends. She had let him go without complaint. She knew that he needed to get out from time to time to relax. The thought of a baby had filled her mind that night as she sat up waiting for him. It was nearly impossible for her to sleep without him next to her. She suddenly heard the door open and then shut quietly and knew it was him. While his back was turned to her she crept up behind him and began to gently kiss his neck.

OOC-I had a thought that maybe either she cannot get pregnant...or does and had a miscarriage. Maybe it happens around the time that Arina and the soldier take off together and he convinces her to go with him to get her mind off of her worries. Perhaps this is fates way of telling her that it isn't time yet and when things between herself and Eldarion start to heal more then she becomes pregnant.

Eldarion jumped. She had completely caught him off guard with the sudden kiss. He turned around quickly but she fluidly avoided his abrupt motion. “Calista! You scared the daylights outta me!” he exclaimed. She had those...soft sultry eyes he quickly noticed it with her grabbing hold of him it was obvious that she was pleased he had come home. Moreover she had ‘that’ look in her expression. A playful, feigned bashful gaze that seemed to want him to sudden get aggressive with her. Turning her down now would most certainly cause an argument he knew. They had happened before and not so long ago. They argued alot of late. Mostly about mundane things they couldn’t stand about one another but when it came to sex and making love, those disagreements might well as not existed. However what he did say was,

“Calista...I’m...tired and a little hungry.”

Calista had been hoping for a more positive reaction than the one she had received. She actually jumped a little at his rather strong response. However, she hoped that she could still save the moment. She softened her expression and looked up at him with desire filled eyes. However, it quickly became evident that Eldarion didn’t have the same desires as she. Disappointment mixed with pain filled her eyes. She felt a few tears come to her eyes. She couldn’t remember the last time he had touched her the way he had before the affair. She looked unhappy and very upset. She simply nodded and turned and walked out of the room without another word to him. She walked into the bathroom and closed the door and began to cry.

For a while a short while Eldarion thought to just let her cry. He had just gotten home and all of a sudden she was doing this, getting overly emotional when he didn’t immediately do what she wanted or expected. It wasn’t at all fair and he didn’t understand it besides. He was both grateful and unhappy. He didn’t like it all when she cried. Feeling both determined and sorry for hurting her he stormed to the bathroom and flung open the doors. She looked up at him, her eyes filled with tears and anguish then he lunged for her and somewhat roughly lifted her up and out of the bathroom. If she wanted him she was going to get him!

Calista was honestly being to wonder if Eldarion even loved her anymore or wanted to be married to her. She was exhausted from trying to save their marriage and was beginning to think it may not be worth it anymore. Suddenly, the doors opened and Eldarion stormed in. She was surprised when he grabbed her and lifted her up to take her out of the bathroom. She struggled against him.

"Eldarion! Put me down!"

Incensed now he continued to carry her and when he reached their bedroom he tossed her down on the bed and then climbed up on top of her. He saw there were tears in her eyes and her voice sounded angry yet he felt he needed to give her this and now he wasn’t sure he didn’t want it either. “Calista...shhh, shhh,” he said as he brushed her hair back. He shifted on her to take hold of her wrists. When she tried to get from his grasp he’d shift with her until he could plant his lips on hers and not gently.

Calista was upset and now becoming angry and a little scared. She wasn't in the mood now and didn't like him trying to force her. She felt him take hold of her wrists and she began to tremble. As he kissed her forcefully she took her knee and brought it up between his legs. As he let go she got out of the bed and looked hard at him.

"What are you doing?!"

He rolled off of her and onto the floor and remained there as he groaned in the fetal position. She had kneed him in the groin and it hurt badly. It took a while for him to be able to straighten. “I don’t like it when you cry,” he managed but his voice sounded strained. If she tried to help him he would turn away from her. “I was just tired and not in the mood Calista. How was I supposed to know it was so important to you?” he asked honestly. “You seem fine one moment and then sad and moody the next..what am I supposed to do with that?” He added.

Calista sat down on the edge of the bed, tears in her eyes. She didn't want to cry in front of him, but she could not stop the tears that began to fall.

"You haven't really touched me the way you used to since...before....I am trying so hard to try and piece our marriage back together, but nothing seems to be working. I'm not even sure if you still want to be married to me. I feel like I lost not only my husband but my best friend too. I'm lonely...and unhappy," she slowly admitted.

Eldarion pulled himself up and sat on the edge of the bed. His groin still hurt and he looked murder over at Calista. He heard what she said, he had heard them before but what she was saying wasn’t truly what this was all about at all.

“You’re trying so hard?” It was difficult to keep the edge he felt out of his voice right then. “Try having a wife who will never forgive her husband for making a mistake? To know that no matter what I do or how hard I work at anything nothing will ever be good enough. Every time I even look at another woman you remind me one way or another. Don’t try to deny it!” he said now more angry than anything else. Being tired and hungry certainly didn’t help. “Besides, that's not what we’re really talking about, is it? It’s about 2 little girls we left in Gehenna and you know it!” he knew his words were biting and he also knew that she really didn’t deserve his ire right then. He moved off the bed and came onto his knees in front of her as he saw tears come down her face.

“Calista,” he began with a much softer tone this time. “You know it was hard for me to leave them behind too.” And it actually was. He had begun to like having them around. He took hold of her hands and pressed his face up against her stomach. “I want to see you happy, I do, I really do but I don’t know what you really want from me,” he said as he pressed his face into her midsection and took in her scent.

Calista visibly winced at Eldarion’s words. They hurt her. She had been so emotionally overwhelmed since finding out about the affair. She had decided to stay with him and had even defended him against his own family when they took things too far. Yes, Eldarion had made a mistake...but it was also a choice. He could have stopped his affair at any time, but he didn’t. It wasn’t until she caught him that he ended things with the other woman. And not only that, but he let this woman invade their home and bed. Every part of her felt violated and betrayed and she wasn’t sure she would ever actually be able to forgive him for what he had done. However, she had been trying to at least move past it and pick up the crumbling pieces of their still very new marriage. Despite everything, she still loved him...still continued to support him...even as she still struggled to deal emotionally with what had happened.

When Eldarion went on to bring up the two girls new tears filled her eyes. Leaving them had been one of the hardest things she had ever had to do, but she had felt she had been doing the best thing for them.

“I don’t know what I want from you either,” Calista finally replied as tears streamed down her cheeks. “I thought I wanted a baby...and I do...but not now...not like this. I just...I just want you to look at me again like you did before...I want...need to know that you still want me. I feel like there is a hole in my heart that I thought I could fill with a child, but I feel it may only drive us further apart.”

OOC-I’m changing things up here from what we had originally talked about. I think at this point Calista knows that even though she desperately wants a baby right now...that it would not fix their marriage...in fact it may only make it worse.

“Calista...I loved you and then I had you only to lose you. I know it wasn’t me truly losing you, but I wasn’t at all prepared for that kind of loneliness. I never felt anything like that before. And...my father, the pressure….his shoes are not so easy to fill,” he admitted. In fact doing was was nearly impossible and it seemed every noble knew it. He came up to his feet then leaned back onto the bed. “Marrying you was the happiest day of my life Calista. That day will stand among the best days that i will ever have in this life. I’m pretty sure it was for you to. If we ever want to build on that foundation, no matter how beaten and battered it may be, then we have to act,” he said and he shook his head. “I’m not willing to let us fall away...I’m not,” he said with tears now in ‘his’ eyes. Something she very rarely ever saw. And he held his arms across his chest as if he were warding the thought away.

Calista looked over at Eldarion as he spoke. His words brought tears to her eyes. She could tell that he wanted to save their marriage as much as she did and that alone gave her all the hope she needed. Seeing the tears in his eyes caused several tears to slip down her own cheeks. She looked deeply into his eyes for a long moment before leaning forward and kissing him. Into that kiss she poured all of her love for him and her belief that they would weather this storm together.

Eldarion kissed her back just as passionately. Now all of their hopes and fears laid bare to one another. “Make love to me,’ he said softly and that was the end of their conversation. A considerable amount of time later, their skin bore red runnels of their passionate, vigorous loving-making, he stroked her sweaty hair as he lay atop her naked body, his lips nuzzling her throat and neck. “I want to go West, over the mountains...would you go with me?” He said in a soft, hopeful voice as he kissed her neck and jawline. His left hand rested on her right breast and their bed was in complete disarray. They had talked about it but since they had returned home there had been much for him to do. Now that things were taking a turn for the better he thought that perhaps they could get away and follow the steps that his father had taken West, over the mountains.

Calista was not just contented, but completely happy for the first time in a long time. This night had given her real hope to hang onto and she didn't feel alone anymore. She felt like she and Eldarion were finally starting to work together to fix their marriage. Feeling his body atop her own made her once again feel like he wanted and needed her...something she hadn't felt since before the affair. She closed her eyes and sighed softly with pleasure as he began to kiss and nuzzle her neck and throat. Their bed was torn apart and their clothes were strewn about the floor. Her hair was rather messy, but she glowed from their lovemaking...both outside and in. Slowly, she opened her eyes to look up into his. She remembered them talking about going West, but talks like that hadn't happened in sometime.

"I would love to go with you," she replied without hesitation. Calista had always dreamt of going on an actual adventure. Marrying into this family and hearing the stories one couldn't help but dream of doing something similar. Calista had started to give up on the idea, but now...here it was again...and this time it could actually become a reality.

Ooc-new thread!