A Woman's Perogotive

The head wound was easy to staunch. He just tightly wound a bandage he pulled from his saddle bags. However she had also broken a few ribs and some of the jagged rock had pierced into her side. He was near to panic through it all, the woman he loved could die out here. Silently he berated himself over and over. If he had just left with his family...none of this would have happened!

With pressure the cuts seemed to have slowed in their bleeding. Enough he hoped to get her up onto his horse. It was a delicate operation. He needed to hoist her up, hold her steady then get up himself. The first attempt she nearly fell backward. The second he was able to mount. With a gesture for her horse to stay close he charged forward toward Edoras. The only place he knew had the healers to keep her alive. That is if the trip didn’t kill her first with all the jostling from the horse.

After neither of them returned Amathera and Thane decided to head back to town…

After the healers had came and left, Narisa had a concussion, 2 broken ribs, a dislocated shoulder and alot of blood loss, they were able to sew her cuts, relocate her shoulder and bandaged her head and side with healing poultices. They had told everyone she might not wake right away but she likely would and to give her as much water or broth as she could stomach when she did wake.

Eomer was not pleased at all with Eagan and, as a result he had not been allowed to tend her. He still came everyday to ask though and everyday he was sent away. Her mother had stayed by her side most of the time. She was there now, reading when Narisa’s eyes finally opened four days later to look up at the ceiling she remembered. Her eyes hurt though due to the light that came in through her window.

Narisa dreamt of Eagan. Over and over in her dreams she yelled at him. In one of her dreams she had her tiara and when she took it off her head it got so big she was able to slip it around his body, pinning his arms to his sides and preventing him from moving. She wanted to wake up...she wanted to tell Eagan she was sorry...that she hadn't meant what she had said.

The first thing she became aware of was the pain in her left side. It hurt whenever she breathed. Slowly, she also became aware of a voice...it was her mother's. She was talking to her...no, reading to her from a book she loved. Ever so slowly her eyes fluttered open. She winced from the light that came in through the window. As her eyes slowly adjusted to the light she glanced around the room.

"Where....where's Eagan?"

Both Lindariel and Eomer were besides themselves with worry, fear, anger and questions when Eagan returned with her as injured as she was. Thane had made accusations against Eagan and so Eomer would not allow Eagan to see Narisa for fear he may hold a grudge for his sister’s rejection. Lindariel didn’t believe that, she knew of Narisa’s fondness for the boy who was now a young man. She had hugged and thanked Eagan for bringing her home. Eomer and Theodred however did not and it was all she could do to keep Theodred from running him through. She set down the book, very relieved when Narisa began to stir. More so when she heard her voice. So relieved she wasn’t certain if she heard what she had said.

“Uh, he is here, in the city Narisa...you gave us all such worry my daughter,” she said softly as she rose to straighten up her blankets in a motherly fashion.

Narisa's head throbbed and her entire body ached. She tried to move and winced in pain from the attempt. Her mouth was dry and her stomach felt very empty. She wasn't sure how much time had passed, but she guessed that at least a day had.

"Please...I want to see him...I...I need to talk to him."

Lindariel shifted to fill the cup with cool water then brought it down for narisa to drink. “Drink slowly Narisa...you’ve been out for almost 4 days,” she said in a soothing tone. “I will speak to your father about letting him come to see you but,” she began however she felt reluctant to trouble Narisa. “Amathera and Thane came to see you...Thane…” She began but paused as she saw Narisa’s eyes begin to look interested. She sighed and went on. “Thane made...accusations toward Eagan and so Eagan has been kept away from you,” Lindariel told her reluctantly. “There is little you can do about it now...all you need to do is rest, are you hungry?” She asked and gestured.

Narisa drank a little of the water. She was terribly thirsty and the co water felt good against her dry throat. When her mother then told her that she had been unconscious for four days she stared at her in shock. Had that much time really passed? She wanted to see Eagan and started to become Angolans upset when her mother informed her that Thane had made accusations against him.

"Eagan didn't do anything to me! He saved my life! I was angry at Thane and took it out on him. This is my fault," she said as tears came to her eyes. "I thought I knew Thane and the kind of man he was but I was wrong Mother."

Lindariel came up to stand beside her bed. “Shhh, shhh girl, everything will work out in the end Narisa. Calm yourself. The whole point of courting is to decide if someone is right for you or not. Do not feel pressure from us about Thane. And an accident has no fault, they simply happen,” she said as she reached over to feel her forehead and cheek to see if they were feverish. “Eagan said that you fell out of a tree? Why is it now that you fell off a horse and now out of a tree and Eagan was close by both times? Is there...anything I should know about?” She couldn’t help but ask. She knew she should not have but the question was out now and she couldn’t take it back. She hoped beyond hope that Narisa had not been as careless as Theodred had been.

Narisa looked over at her mother when she began to question her about her relationship with Eagan and why he always seemed to be close by when something happened. Her face turned red from embarrassment.

"No, Mother. Eagan and I are just...friends. He knew I was upset over Thane and came after me, but I yelled at him and told him to leave. I then felt bad for yelling at him and wanted to go after him and that's when I fell. Thankfully he was still close enough to hear me yelling for help."

Lindariel raised an eyebrow at her daughter but remained silent and listened to what she said. Why Narisa would not admit she had feelings for Eagan she did not know but it was a woman’s prerogative to stay clear of a man, especially if her wits escaped her when she was near him. In her entire life she had never seen Narisa fall from her horse or a tree save for these 2 times. Eagan was such a man and though Lindariel liked Eagan she wasn’t sure if Narisa was ready to give her heart to him completely. That and she was indebted to him for probably saving her life. Everyone was and she would have to have words with Thane. He wrongly accused Eagan of having something to do with Narisa’s accident. Lindariel looked up briefly and saw Eagan who had only stepped into the hall.

“Well, it sounds to me like you owe Eagan at least an apology yes? Well, I will leave you to it then but I will be back soon,” she said softly then leaned in and gave her a kiss on the forehead. She gestured toward the hall and Eagan nodded and stepped into Narisa’s room. He bowed smoothly to them and he kept a smooth, calm face as he looked at her as the queen exited then closed the door behind her.

“Thank the light you’re all right...I wanted to stay to at least see if you would be,” he said plainly. “But...but you won’t have to worry, I’ve already packed to leave. I just wanted to say goodbye Narisa,” he said as he leaned down to kiss her cheek. It was difficult to hold back his emotions but he managed it all smoothly. He smiled down at her as he began to straighten.

Narisa wasn’t sure of her feelings for Eagan. They had always been friends, and at one time had been more than that, but after things had ended badly the last time she was afraid that should things end badly again that their friendship could never be repaired. However, she could not deny that she wanted him around.

She looked up as Eagan walked in. It was hard to meet his gaze as she remembered yelling at him. It had been wrong of her to do so and she could only hope that he would forgive her. However, before she could apologize he suddenly told her that he was packed and ready to leave. She looked up at him and felt a few tears come to her eyes.

“Please don’t leave Eagan. I’m so sorry for yelling at you. I was upset about Thane and I took it out on you and I am so sorry. This wasn’t your fault and whatever Thane said wasn’t true and I have told my mother that.”

Eagan sighed then came to sit beside her on the edge of her bed and reached into his pocket. “I’m not upset that you yelled at me Narisa, there is no need to apologize. I should have left you alone when you needed to be. And I will always be your friend, no matter where you are,” he said softly as he turned to hand her his handkerchief. “I...I just...my family needs me, you know my father,” he said uneasily though it was also mostly a lie. Eagan had told his parents he might stay in Rohan a long while yet. But he wasn’t certain he could exist here at an arm's length away from Narisa. He couldn’t help but look into her eyes. He so wanted to tell her how he felt about her. How he thought about her every waking moment and how hard it had been to walk away when he did. He had been so worried when she hadn’t woken up after the first day. And then the second and third his stomach wouldn’t allow him to eat at all.

“Besides, you got alot of people to care for you, I doubt one more or less will make much of a difference,” Eagan added and gestured offhandedly.

Narisa knew that Eagan was lying. She knew he still had feelings for her. He had all but told her out loud that he loved her at the picnic. She didn’t want him to go, but didn’t want to lead him on either. She started to say something about it, but decided against it rather quickly. Their past relationship was something difficult for them to discuss. She finally just sighed softly and looked at him.

“Will you write to me?”

OOC-was hoping to drag this out for a while

Her apparent apathy at hearing he was leaving brought a sudden flush of heat to his temper. A heat he could not keep from his eyes.

“You’d let me go...just like that?” He asked surprised that she would. She was always so stubborn. Unwilling to bend or to show him any deference, he shook his head and turned his gaze down to the floor. “You feel nothing for me...that….that goes beyond friendship?” he asked hesitantly. This might be disastrous he thought. She may well say she did not and then where would he be?

Narisa was surprised by Eagan’s sudden outburst. She had been trying to avoid this topic, but clearly he wanted to discuss it. She felt her heart start to beat a little harder in her chest. She did not want to destroy their friendship, which had taken so long to repair.

“I...I’m not sure Eagan,” she said honestly. “I feel something, yes, but the last time we moved beyond friendship it ended...well badly to put it lightly. And then it took so long for us to become friends again. I...I don’t know what I would do if that happened again. I don’t think we would ever be able to be friends again.”

“We weren’t meant to just be friends,” he blurted before he really thought about it. “I...I think about you all the time. Not like a friend Narisa,” he said though he continued to keep his eyes down. “I’ve tried to ignore how I feel. To trick myself into believing I can stand back and watch you ‘be’ with someone else,” he said almost hauntedly. They were younger when they first tried to be more than friends. Now, they were almost adults. Though sometimes her stubbornness bordered on childish. He’d never tell her that though.

Narisa wasn’t at all sure how to respond. Eagan was really pushing her now and she didn’t like it. They were still young, and she was nowhere near ready to get married. After Thane she really just wanted to take a break from courtship to discover more about herself and continue to become stronger. She needed to truly know who she was before she chose one man to be with for the rest of her life.

“Eagan…” she began slowly, “I really just want some time right now to not be with anyone. We’re still young and I have no plans on getting married anytime soon. Will you give me a year just to myself and let me then revisit the idea of a relationship between us?”

And there she went again. Dictating to him what would be. She was always doing that. Always playing at being a princess. Well, he knew she was in reality. To him though she was not just ‘any’ princess. She belonged to him though she fought hard against that, against him. He shook his head in disagreement. “Always you stipulate what has to be. Why not just let things happen organically? I do not expect anything more than that Narisa. But I will not be set aside by another man either. I do not suggest we agree to marry. I am only suggesting we let what exists between us grow,” he said plainly and then he turned to look at her. “In time if you do not feel as if...as if love exists toward me...then we can cross that bridge when we come to it. I need you Narisa, to deny that is to deny myself.”

Narisa was exhausted and very hungry and thirsty. She didn’t want to argue with Eagan anymore. She just wanted food, drink and to sleep. Her entire body ached and her head throbbed and this conversation was not helping any of that.

She sighed and was quiet a few long moments before finally speaking again.

“Fine....but I do not want to feel pressured Eagan. I don’t want to feel as if I can’t even talk to another man or dance with another man at a party. Will you at least agree to this?”

He looked at her and saw how pale she still was. How terrible she must really feel but he was not going to concede. “I will agree to discuss this again when you are feeling better,” he said softly. He would not let her present condition dictate how they would proceed. He stood and turned to face her. He leaned over and smiled warmly down at her. He touched her face gently and brushed her hair back carefully. He lowered and kissed her forehead and then her cheek very softly. “I do love you Narisa,” he whispered to her softly. “I will go and fetch you something to eat,” he said then straightened.

Narisa was feeling frustrated and felt that Eagan was just going to wear her down until she agreed to everything he wanted. He was just as stubborn as claimed she was she thought to herself. She sighed, not having the energy to argue any further. She just needed something to eat and something more to drink. As he leaned over and kissed her forehead and then her cheek she closed her eyes and breathed in his scent. It was comforting and familiar and she was reminded of lying with her head on his chest out at night looking up at the stars.

“Thank you,” she said gently when he told her he would bring her something to eat. “Some tea would be nice as well.”

He raised an eyebrow at her in mock consternation but then it faded quickly and he smiled then winked playfully at her. “As you wish,” he said just as Lindariel and Theodred opened the door to her room and strode in. Eagan and Theodred looked blankly at one another but the room got noticeably cooler as Eagan stepped out.

“I hope you are feeling better?” Theodred asked as he and Lindariel stepped up to her bed side. She filled the cup again as Theodred leaned over her and kissed her forehead. “With all this sympathy and care you seem to get lately I am considering getting hurt myself,” he said mockingly getting a glare from their mother. He squeezed her arm affectionately then stood with his hands clasped behind his back. “Mother told me about Thane, but I am still not so sure about Eagan,” he said honestly. “Father will see you this evening,” he added belatedly. She would know when he did come he would slip her a few sweets. He always did that when she was ill.

Nauriel watched as Eagan left. As he started out the door her mother and Theodred walked in. She couldn't help but notice the look that passed between them. She sighed a little to herself, but couldn't help but smile at her brothers comment.

"I can push you out of a tree if you wish. You'll find it's not as pleasant as it looks."

She was quiet a moment before speaking to him again.

"Please be nice to Eagan. He's my friend and he defended your relationship with Elisa to Thane."

Theodred smiled down at her. “Well, that is...something I suppose. I will...go easy on him...for your sake sister,” he said kindly. He had honestly been as worried as everyone else. She looked so pale and she had lost so much blood. As they talked Lindariel gave her several sips of water and also checked her bandages. One was seeping, there had been a little infection so that would have to be changed soon she thought and held back a wince as she settled the blankets back down. “I never liked Thane anyway,” he added. Lindariel had suffered loss before. Long ago when Jamie died. She had broke down two days ago when Narisa did not wake up. Eomer was there with her. She did not want to lose it in front of him but when he comforted her she could not hold it all in. She was awake and besides a few scars, she’d be back on her feet in a few days.

“I’m surprised you can think of much else than Elisa Theodred. She really must stop this working in her father’s smithy and come to court. She has much to learn,” she said plainly. Theodred had had that argument with her already and only grunted at her words.

Narisa smiled at her brother when he told her that he would be nice to Eagan. She hoped he would keep his promise. Eagan had been the one to save her life after all. Narisa took a few sips of cool water. She felt like she could drink an entire bucket of water for how thirsty she was. She was also quite hungry and looking forward to whatever Eagan would bring her.

"Isn't her birthday coming up?" Narisa asked her brother. "What are you going to get her?"

Theodred smiled brightly at her mention of Elisa’s birthday. He had already arranged her a full day with a seamstress. “Well, since you asked, I am going to lock her in a room with mother’s seamstresses for a day. She will be sized, weighed and measured and have dresses made for her. She will be pampered and doted upon and likely hate me for it,” he said with an almost devilish grin. Elisa HATED being pampered but as she had agreed to marry him, it would come with her station. Lindariel hid a grin of her own at that. Teaching the woman manners at table had been...less than easy.

Eagan finally arrived. He had a large, covered tray but even from where he was she could smell freshly baked bread, meat or stew of some kind and a lemon tea. He nodded to everyone as he sat the tray down on her bedside table. Theodred nodded back then approached Narisa again. “Eat and rest dear sister, I will visit you again on the morrow,” he said then gave her hand a little squeeze. Lindariel looked at Eagan suspiciously as Theodred left.

“I’m not certain she can eat very much Eagan. Will you stay with her or shall I?” She began but Eagan broke in. “Oh, my queen, I will only give her just enough so she is not famished and no more,” he said quickly. She eyed him doubtfully. “See that you do,” she said dryly then looked down at Narisa. “I’ll be back tonight daughter to read to you some if you are awake,” she said as she gave her a small smile and exited the room.

“Whew...that was close,” Eagan said then he uncovered the tray. Along with the small kettle of tea, there was butter, honey, biscuits and blueberry jam along with a large bowl of beef stew that had simmered all day long. Besides the bowl was a large piece of blackberry cobbler. Eagan was very thankful the queen had not lifted the tray dome. “So...how hungry are you?” he asked with a smile. “And if you think I am not going to take this chance to dote over you, you are greatly mistaken,” he said as he lifted a biscuit and began to slather on the butter. “Honey or the jam?” He asked as he held up the butter knife. It would be clear to her that he fully intended to feed her.