Luca and Laura (May 1986)

Frank downed the Bourbon and tossed the bartender a ten spot and followed her out. She was already several steps away from him. “So then I’m not enough,” he said loudly and people that were near him looked over at him. He didn’t care a whit though. He began to follow her. “So we love one another, for two years, and you want more in your life than I can fill up, is that it?” he asked but she didn’t stop to talk to him. He rushed up to her.

“Will you talk to me god damnit!” He said angrily. Frank wasn’t known for his patience and mild temperament. He turned her around to face him. “Why can’t you admit that I’m not enough for you? I want you to say it to my face Isabella,” He said harshly. She was crying but he was tired of all of her evasions and wanted the hard truth. It didn't no matter how much it hurt...well he thought that it didn't anyway. He was frustrated. He loved her and didn't want 'them' to end.

Isabella looked up at Frank and felt herself on the verge of breaking down. “And why can’t you admit that I’m not enough for you? I know you want to go back to what you were doing before you started working in construction. I’ve seen you at night when you think I’m asleep looking at the equipment you used. So don’t act like I’m the only one here not saying what I actually want.”

Frank wanted to slap her but the last time he did that, over a year ago he recalled she nearly kicked his ass and refused to talk to him for a week. “I asked you for honesty and you do what you always do and turn the conversation around to suit you. Very well,” He said in a defeated tone.

“I do think about it, sometimes. But its my problem, not yours. I keep it to myself and you’d be the first to know if I changed my mind about ‘staying out of the game’ but I don’t see that happening. I’ve told you I was out, I’m with you, I ‘love’ you and I’ll never ever betray you. We work out our problems so why would I look for someone else? That is the difference you refuse to understand. The difference is that you want what you want. The sooner you can admit that the sooner you can let me go Isabella. Because I won’t go unless you let me. I can’t, don’t you see that?” he asked as he put his hands onto her arms.

Isabella didn’t know what to say. Her heart was breaking and Frank would be able to see that in her eyes. She wanted a baby. She knew she did...even if it meant sacrificing her career. She knew she wouldn’t be able to easily let that go. She loved Frank...deeply, but they wanted different things. If they didn’t end this now then they were both going to resent each other and she didn’t want that.

She leaned against him and began to cry against his chest.

“Shhhh, it’s going to be alright Isabella,” Frank said softly as he enveloped her in his arms. “It will be, you’ll see,” he murmured as he kissed her forehead and then when she tilted her head up to look at him, her lips. There was only a soft, loving look in his eyes for her right then and he shifted his hands up to her face and gently wiped away her tears. Frank was not going to storm off and pout about not being ‘her one’. Those kinds of games were for men and women who were children in adult bodies. He could not be everything that she wanted and she wanted more than he could be for her. For his part he was happy with Isabella. She was the one for him but that only likely made her feel worse about this. But as in all things he knew that the rawness of this loss would fade overtime like any other scar.

When they got back to the apartment he fixed them both a drink and, with the bottle in his hand hand they settled on the couch together and she leaned into him and snuggled up as if she were freezing and needed his warmth right then. He put his arm around her as the quiet of the apartment settled in on them. She took a sip, then he took a sip. She took a sip then he did. Her and than him. He filled their glasses and she looked up at him. She had that look she often had when she needed him. Not in a general way either. She wanted him to take her to their bed he could see that in her eyes that were smudged from her makeup running and red from crying. Frank took their glasses and set them on the coffee table. He retained hold of the bottle and stood and extended a hand to her. Together they walked into the bedroom and he took a sip from the bottle as she began to undress.

Nothing about this night was going to be easy. They both knew it was over and Isabella was heartsick over it. She loved Frank and she was Ted him to know that. She just couldn’t deny what she wanted and she knew Frank wasn’t going to change his mind. She and Frank had changed each other for the better over the last two years and Isabella knew she was the woman she was today because of him. She needed him though...one last time.

No words were spoken because they didn’t need to be. Their lovemaking that night was much more tender and gentle than most other nights and Frank made it last for quite a while. There was true, deep love between them that Isabella knew would never fully disappear...no matter who she might eventually end up with.

Afterward, she lay in his arms with her head on his chest just listening to his heartbeat and breathing in his scent.

“I love you Frank...so much.”

Frank had not slept and it had taken a long time for Isabella to drift off. She had been exhausted from the gambit of emotion that assaulted her about everything that had happened. At least she would remember the pleasure he brought her when they were together. The pleasure, the laughs, the smiles...the moments that they shared together, He would remember them to, always. He left most of his clothes. He had already packed clothes to put on and he already knew where he was going. Back to a small military style bunk and cold beans for his supper. He was who he was and so was Isabella. He would always love her and consider her a very close friend.

He took one last look at the kitchen, a place they made delicious food together in as they stood side by side. She was his companion in that just like in everything. He thought that he would miss that most of all. Setting his key down on the counter he left the apartment and never looked back.

Isabella awoke suddenly with a start. She knew before she even looked around that Frank was gone. She could just feel it in her very soul. The apartment felt...empty and incredibly lonely. She reached over and took up the pillow he used and buried her head into it and breathed in his scent. A few tears began to slip down her cheeks. She began to fear she had made a mistake. Suddenly, she thought she heard someone. Was it Frank coming back? She jumped up and put on her robe and rushed out into the living room and opened the door. She looked down the hallway but only saw a neighbor entering their apartment. She closed the door and locked it. She then stepped into the kitchen and for a moment she could almost see Frank and herself standing in the kitchen laughing and smiling as they cooked together. She could smell the food and taste the wine on his lips when he kissed her. She looked over and saw his key laying on the countertop and something inside of her just broke. She sank down to the floor and began to sob.